How many times can you step on the same rake?
Life is not like a checklist. Lessons must be learned from experience. If you do not apply the acquired knowledge in practice, then it will be of no use. And if something happened to you once, you have no guarantee that it will not happen again. Likewise, just because you were once good at something doesn't mean you will always be good at it.
Sometimes life's harshest lessons have to be learned over and over again. It depends on us whether we will have time to recognize that we have fallen into the same puddle, so that this time we can make a different decision and get out of it.
1. The easiest path ends up being the slipperiest.
Perhaps this is the very first life lesson we learn.
When something seems too good to be true, it usually isn't. Free cheese really can only be found in a mousetrap.
The path may seem easy because the possible ones cannot always be seen at first glance. We often choose it over others simply because we were hasty and careless in our choice. Sometimes it happens by accident, sometimes it happens on purpose, despite all the stop lights and red flags we couldn't help but notice.
But the result is always the same. In reality, the easy path often turns out to be much more difficult for us than the right one, but not as attractive if we had followed it from the very beginning.
2. A love roller coaster needs good brakes.
Do you know examples of relationships that developed at a speed of thousands of kilometers per hour? When did couples spend 24 hours a day together and couldn’t get enough of each other? Have you talked to your partner about marriage after three months acquaintance?
Such relationships are full of passion and fire. But usually they are the first and... And they break into pieces.
Yes, love is like a roller coaster. This is probably how it should be. But one of the hardest lessons we need to learn is that we need to slow down.
You need to understand when it’s worth speeding up, and when it’s better to move slower, when to jump into the pool headlong, and when to hold your horses.
Because without brakes, you will speed up more and more and miss the opportunity to learn things about each other that are important to know. And accept each other for who you are. By the time you realize it, it may be too late.
3. It’s better to do a little, but regularly, than to occasionally give yourself a rush
Some people believe that one day everything will work out for them on its own. What kind of day is this, I wonder? How do you imagine it? Do you think you'll one day wake up in a luxurious mansion with two Ferraris parked outside the door? Where should all this come from, from a magical portal?
One fine day is today. You need to start being happy with your life right now. Something needs to change now. There won't be a better moment.
A big breakthrough can only be achieved through gradual small steps. You won't be able to press rewind like the character in the movie Click. Whatever you want to become, make every effort to achieve this right now.
4. Knowing yourself is much more important than personal achievements.
This difficult lesson is that achievements should not determine your satisfaction with yourself. It’s quite easy to tell from a person what exactly gives him self-confidence. Confidence based only on personal achievements is unstable, it is more associated with selfishness and does not lead to inner harmony.
This does not mean that you should not set goals and try to achieve them. It is important to understand where the feeling of satisfaction comes from.
If you only chase achievements, you will never achieve complete satisfaction. True satisfaction is determined only by freedom of creativity, the desire to do better and one’s craft. Achievements quickly lose their importance.
You will climb the mountain, trying your best to overcome the steep climb, biting into the stones to reach the top. But you won’t have time to reach it and enjoy the view when you notice the next higher mountain. And then you will think that it seems that you have achieved nothing, and now you have a new ascent ahead of you. As you can see, the approach is a dead end.
5. You are a reflection of the people you spend most of your time with.
Tell me who your friend is and I will tell you who you are. The people around you serve as your mirror. In them you can see yourself, your own features. If you spend most of your time with people who have the same fears, insecurities or negative qualities, you will become accustomed to these characteristics in yourself. They will only become stronger, and you will think that it is just part of your nature.
Conversely, if you interact more with people who challenge your fears, self-doubt and other weak points, you will inevitably begin to change. You will absorb and adopt positive features, which you may be missing.
Consciously choosing your environment will help you make yourself exactly the person you want to be. Are you lacking confidence? Communicate with confident people. Want to learn a new skill? Move more around people who already have it well developed.
There is another side to this. Sometimes it can be quite difficult to know when to leave. Sometimes people appear in our lives at the right moment when we need to learn something from them, and they need to learn something from us. Then it begins to form. But any relationship is part of your journey. And sometimes it’s very difficult to know when it’s time for your paths to diverge. To do this, you need to constantly pay great attention to how you spend your time and with whom you spend it.
6. You can't help but change, and trying to stay the same sometimes only causes harm.
Most people strive for security and stability. This is fine.
It is important to understand the value of change. Change cannot be avoided. It's usually scary. We fear change because it involves uncertainty. And we would like to keep our lives under control.
To get rid of this fear, you need, on the contrary, to strive for change. Self-development in general can be compared to regular ones. If you go to Gym and do the same exercises day after day, eventually your body gets used to the same load and these exercises cease to be difficult for it. Then the plateau effect begins to take effect. You become comfortable, but at a certain point this comfort begins to work against you. To move forward, changes are needed.
Don't expect them to come by themselves. Change yourself. When you start to feel the slightest signs that you are stuck in a rut, begin to consciously make changes in your life. Give warning strikes, be one step ahead of yourself. Force your brain and body to work, try something new and unknown.
7. Inside yourself, you always know which way to go.
The main thing is to listen to your inner voice. Change jobs or stay in the same place? Save the relationship or move on? Do what you like or what others want you to do? Often there are two answers to all these questions: the answer dictated by reason or habits, and the answer that our inner voice tells us.
We all hear it. We all know how and when it sounds. However, sometimes it is so difficult to follow it.
Why? Because our ego forces us to follow much louder voices that lure us with the promise of comfort, security, great achievements or the absence of pain. We stay in the office instead of going around the world, once again reading other people's books instead of writing our own. We allow ourselves to be led astray even though we know what we really need.
The problem is that the inner voice will not go away. And the more you ignore him, the louder he will turn to you. Perhaps his whisper will eventually turn into a scream. And you will have to listen to him. This is probably how people begin to feel, for example, a midlife crisis.
Value yourself. Trust your inner voice. Your heart does not lie, it will not tell you the wrong path.
All these lessons can sometimes be difficult to pass the first time. The sooner we realize what they are teaching us, the sooner we will stop walking through our personal rake field.
Life is not an easy thing, however, in order to understand it to the end, sometimes the entire path of life is not enough. Life lessons need to be learned not only through trial and error, but also learned without contact.
The fact is that humanity is constantly accumulating knowledge, so it must be used in full. A huge number of people lived on Earth before us, so we simply do not need to experiment on ourselves. All the truths have long been known, so you only need to know them and believe in them, so as not to waste time and energy checking them. This will allow you to develop the right character traits and attract good luck.
Choosing a life path
It is impossible to choose a path in life in advance. Of course, the overall goal remains the same throughout the entire journey, but there are always some corrective events. We must be flexible, ready to change our principles and look at the world differently. Everything changes - music, books, fashion, values. What can I say, people even change their gender.
Your life path must constantly change because you learn more and more life lessons. Of course, it’s easier when you alone do it much less often. The life lessons discussed below will help you much more quickly set the right goals for yourself and choose the ideal model of behavior, choose best regards to everything that surrounds you.
Life lessons you need to know
Lesson one: Believe in yourself. This is especially true for those who believe that no one believes in them. Why do you need someone if you have yourself. Believe in your strength, in your skills. If they are not there, then believe in the possibility of receiving them. You can get what you want. Thoughts are material, as they say. This is absolutely true, but not because there are many books on this topic. Many people are living examples of this. how far thoughts can take us. This can be either a high mountain or a deep hole, so don’t drive yourself into it with doubts.
Second lesson: learn to rest. When you work excessively, it is no better than if you do not work at all. The body always needs rest. Rest 5-10 minutes per hour, two hours a day, 1-2 days a week, 2 weeks every six months. This will be enough for that. to restore strength. You need to be able to dry off, but it’s not difficult, because it’s enough to just throw all thoughts out of your head. Force yourself to abstract yourself from any problems, just relax. You can use meditation music or a quiet place for this.
Lesson three: don't be afraid to learn. It's okay to admit that you don't know something. Many people pretend that they know everything, but they get nothing but ridicule. There is nothing easier than occupying a niche and staying in place. If you do not develop, you will not become successful or remain at the top of Olympus in the field that you love with all your heart.
Lesson four: don't count on luck. Luck comes only to those who deserve it. If you lie on the couch and think that someone will come into your life and change it, then you are wasting your time. Water will never flow under a lying stone. Moreover, as wisdom says, success often does not come even to those who create favorable conditions for this. Often you just have to take what you need. Of course, we should not forget about the rules of morality and law.
Lesson 5: Don't put money first. Of course, money is important, but not so much as the opportunity to acquire new skills or inspire someone to do a good deed. Money is just a means of survival. There is no need to put them first, because the pursuit of material assets can turn you into a greedy person.
Lesson six: don’t be afraid to take someone around you as an example. There are people who can teach you something very important. They are around you, they are near you constantly. These are parents, friends, boss, wife, husband. Anyone can become your teacher.
Lesson Seven: Choose Your Environment Carefully. Your luck and success in life depend largely on who surrounds you. People, like a magnet, attract good or evil, wealth or poverty. This is obvious, because communication with one group of people is useful in some ways, but not in others.
Eighth lesson: don't sit still. If you have the opportunity to get out of the house, go for a walk. If you can travel to another city to visit friends or loved ones, do so. If you can visit another country, go. Don't waste your life.
Lesson nine: Meet people without fear. Making new connections is always an important part of success. People understand this very late, when in old age they have almost no friends and people with whom they could chat banally about something. Loneliness is a framework, not a curse. You build walls around yourself.
Lesson Ten: Plan Your Time. Don't do something just because you're inspired. You need to spend more time doing things that you previously planned. Time management is great way structure your life.
Lesson Eleven: Compete. Many people wonder why athletes are so purposeful and successful in business. It's simple, because they put their whole lives into competing with those who are stronger, faster and better. A competitive spirit will allow you to become more successful in everything. This is great motivation.
Twelfth lesson: do not follow the example of the majority. Take examples from unique individuals. If you see crowds of people trying to do one thing, then it’s better to go in the same direction, but along a different path. There is no need to blindly follow the masses. This applies to everything.
Lesson Thirteen: Stereotypes Make You Weak. Herd mentality is the greatest enemy of individuality, which in turn helps people become themselves. Individuality is remembered, so don't be the same as everyone else.
Lesson fourteen: be careful and attentive to money. Buying unnecessary junk is a habit of the poor. Smart and rich people rarely buy anything, but they buy expensive and good things.
Lesson Fifteen: Respect Your Parents. In most great cultures that lived not for 50-700 years, but for millennia, they respected and valued their elders. IN modern world There are almost no nationalities left. Who could boast about it. The sooner you understand that your parents need your respect, the better it will be for you. At the same time, it doesn’t matter at all who they are and who they have become. The main thing is that they are your parents.
Lesson sixteen: lead healthy image life. Now you may not have health problems due to cigarettes and alcohol, but later they will definitely appear. Don't ruin your life in advance. Take care of yourself and do not abuse bad habits.
Lesson seventeen: value your time. This is universal advice that can and should be taken in different ways. Many people have a very strange attitude towards their lives, spending time on things that do not give them pleasure. Sometimes you need to do this in order to achieve your dreams, but there is nothing worse than doing something you don’t love or living in vain day after day, without emotions, without action.
Life is a complicated thing, and it’s not without reason that they say that you still need to be able to live your life well. Sometimes life presents us with such problems that solving them seems like something out of science fiction.
How to overcome everything and make your life bloom with ever new and very bright colors?
There are several lessons that every person must learn in order to improve their life at least a little.
So, meet the Life Lessons:
1 You and I live in the present
We need to remember that we are in the present time, that is, we do not need to worry too much about the past (it cannot be returned), and think about the future very often (especially in a negative form). We just need to Live - with a capital L of this word, and also try to make our lives better here and now. And remember that it’s not just “thinking about the future”, but much more effective.
2 Life is very short
Life is short, so everything in this life needs to be done, and the sooner you start, the better it will be. So stop for a moment and think about what is truly important and paramount to you in life, and what does not matter. And start acting based on these priorities. Without delay!
3 If it’s very hard for you today, then tomorrow it will definitely pay off
Therefore, you should never lose heart and give up when faced with difficulties. They are always there when we start something new and truly worthwhile. Ask yourself this question: “Am I ready to spend 5 years of my life in a way that others don’t want, and then to live the rest of my life in a way that others never dreamed of?!” My answer is definitely YES!
4 Don’t put off until tomorrow what you can do today
Believe me, if this becomes a habit for you, then you and everyone around you will simply be amazed at the fact that all your affairs will be done simply at cosmic speed.
5 In any, even the most terrible mistake, there is a positive experience
For those people who continue to hope for the best, even when they are in a very difficult situation, there is always a chance to fix everything, so do not pay attention to mistakes, but just move on.
6 You are your best friend
Before other people start liking you, before they start respecting you and considering you, you must first make friends with yourself. We must begin to like ourselves, respect ourselves and reckon with ourselves.
7 Less words, more action
The person whose words do not differ from his deeds is worthy of the respect of others. But the one who does things without further ado and achieves success is doubly worthy of this respect. Do more, rather than talk.
8 If everyone in the world does at least one good deed during the day, the world will change for the better.
This lesson has no comments. Help a beggar or take an old lady across the road and this world will change. At least for you.
9 Time heals all pain
Here's an excerpt from one book:
“When I asked my grandmother a few years ago how to forget everything bad that happened to me, she drew two circles and said, “Look at them.” Black circles are our life experience. Mine is bigger because I’m older and have seen a lot. And the little red circle inside is all the bad things that happened to us. Let's say that something bad happened to us - the same thing.
But on my black circle it will take up a much smaller percentage of its area. For you it seems much larger because it is a fair part of your life experience. I'm not saying it's not important, but I look at it completely differently. Understand that what is most important to you now and covers the whole wide world, over time will be pushed into the past and will seem far less important than it is now.”
10 Never give up!
In this lesson I will simply quote the words of Mike Tyson: “When it’s very difficult for me, I remind myself that if I give up now, it won’t make me feel any better!”
I hope that these life lessons will at least make it a little better!
Thank you and good luck to you!
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Regina Brett, a two-time Pulitzer Prize winner, became world famous for writing this philosophical thought column.
And she knows what she's talking about - she's been through a lot in her life. These lessons are written by a woman who raised her child alone for 18 years and managed to beat breast cancer at 41, a woman who only met her true love at 45 and was able to achieve success and have a brilliant career.
45 lessons that life taught me:
- Life isn't fair, but it's still good.
- When in doubt, take another step forward.
- Life is too short to waste it on hatred.
- Don't take yourself too seriously.
- Pay off your credit card debts every month.
- You don't have to win every argument.
- Cry with someone. It's more healing than crying alone.
- You might get angry at God. He will understand.
- Save for retirement from your first salary.
- When it comes to chocolate, there is no point in resisting.
- Make peace with your past so that it does not spoil your present.
- There is nothing wrong with children seeing you cry.
- Don't compare your life to someone else's. You have no idea what they are really going through.
- If the relationship must be secret, it is better to abandon it.
- Everything can change in the blink of an eye. But don't worry: God won't blink.
- Life is too short to waste it on long boring parties.
- You can reschedule anything if today is interesting for you.
- The writer writes. Write if you want to be a writer.
- It's never too late to have a happy childhood. However, your second childhood depends entirely on you.
- When the time comes to pursue what you truly love in this life, don't give up.
- Burn candles, use nice sheets, wear nice underwear. Don't save anything for a special occasion. This a special case- Today.
- Do everything in your power and even more, and then whatever happens.
- Be eccentric now. Don't wait until you're old to wear bright red clothes.
- The most important organ in sex is the brain.
- Your happiness does not depend on anyone but you.
- During any so-called disaster, ask yourself the question: “Will this still matter in five years?”
- Goodbye to everything and everyone.
- You shouldn't care what others think of you.
- Time heals almost everything. Give it time.
- It doesn't matter whether the situation is good or bad - it will change.
- Your job won't take care of you if you get sick. Your friends and family will do this, so take care of these relationships.
- Believe in miracles.
- Growing old is a better alternative than dying young.
- Your children only have one childhood. Make it unforgettable.
- Go out for a walk every day. Miracles happen everywhere.
- If we piled up all our problems and compared them with other people's, we would quickly take ours away.
- There is no need to constantly look back at life. Just do the best you can right now.
- Envy is a waste of time. You already have everything you need.
- However, the best is yet to come.
- Get rid of anything that isn't useful, beautiful, or fun.
- All that really matters in the end is what you loved.
- It doesn't matter how you feel - get up, get dressed and go out into people.
- Give in.
- Take a deep breath. It calms the mind.
- Even though life isn't tied up with a bow, it's still a gift.
I was once a schoolgirl, then I became a teacher. I did equally well in all or almost all subjects. But how many of them have been useful to me in life? Looking back, I can now say quite clearly: which subjects turned out to be useful to me, and which ones - not so much. Some of them, if I had my way, I would leave and even expand, while others I would significantly reduce or even remove from the school curriculum.
Exact sciences
I have just returned from a forum where young mothers are arguing whether exact sciences are necessary for everyone. As for the “university”, let the associate professors and professors, advisers and experts of the Ministry of Education decide. I can only answer for my own experience: the exact sciences HAVE BEEN USEFUL to me.
No, I didn't calculate the height own home by using trigonometric formulas, and the other formulas were of little use to me in their pure form. But exact sciences taught me:
- count and calculate;
- think analytically and logically;
- having a couple known values, identify unknowns;
- understand the initial laws of the universe.
Before my first and only loan, I was very worried that I would not be able to pay my fees on time. Both daughters studied at university, one at a paid university, the other at free of charge. All the money went whistling into this abyss, there was little left until payday. Naturally, I wanted to know exactly what my dues would be and what penalties would apply to those who were late. I received the contract, but asked to take it home, which incredibly surprised the bank employee.
Having calculated well on the calculator, adding up the costs for electricity and heating, plus the minimum costs for food and unexpected expenses for medicines and tights, I refused that loan and took it elsewhere. And even this one, more loyal, I could barely pull through. Thanks to my class teacher, mathematics and algebra teacher - she taught me to count.
It's the same with physics. Thanks to our old physicist, our whole class learned to connect electrical circuits, repair training sockets and switches. Low bow to you, Andrey Georgievich.
And thank you for teaching us how to distinguish the electrical conductivity of objects and I know exactly what can be shocked by current and what cannot, and how to deal with static electricity.
But about astronomy, about Kepler’s laws, as well as Newton’s laws, I only know that there seem to be only two of them, and they all relate to mass and energy. That's all I took away from the school course. We learned constellations later together with our daughters from interesting children's magazines “The World Around You”.
Chemistry turned out to be, despite all its attractiveness, not such an applied science. Well, I know that NaCl is salt and H2O is water. But in choosing household chemicals these are now used chemical formulas, about which I have no idea: whether they are harmful compounds or neutral ones.
Natural science
Botany, zoology and anatomy, as well as geography - I classified all this as natural sciences. I never had a passion for them, but, oddly enough, they came in handy. My dear granny taught us floriculture, and I learned how to destroy pests without killing the flowers themselves. houseplants. I learned how to fertilize and correctly pinch shoots to achieve fullness.
I know who pollinates whom flora, and how fertilization generally occurs, including in humans. Mendel’s laws of heredity are, in principle, an interesting thing, but I’m unlikely to be able to figure out whose nose my offspring will inherit: maybe mine, or maybe my second cousin’s, based on a strange combination of genes.
The animal world is quite interesting and diverse, but zoology was useful to me only in keeping my pets, and even then, I dug through a lot of literature. I think that there is no point in studying zoology for a whole year; they provide extensive but superficial knowledge. It would be better to give short but useful ones - about the diseases of domestic animals or about their maintenance/upbringing.
Geography was presented one-sidedly. I knew the map of Russia well, but even the geography of the Union republics was very bad, not to mention the rest of the world. Well, which of you can tell offhand where Argentina is located - in Northern or South America? What about the Dominican Republic?
Humanities
The humanities, especially languages, have been very useful to me in my life. They, and also literature, feed me to this day. Maria Mikhailovna was an honored teacher of Russian language and literature. She forced our immature minds to think, taught our clumsy tongue to find suitable words to convey our emotions to listeners and readers.
But here's the bad thing: the volume of books to read was and remains too large. I think I was the only one in the class who read all four volumes of War and Peace. So we had meaningful dialogues with the teacher, while the rest quietly dozed off. I remember with a shudder how I waded through the long French dialogues, so beloved by Lev Nikolaevich, with footnotes, asterisks and translator’s explanations. Who can master this at 15 years old? Audiobooks are not the answer. Auditory perception is a rare form of perception. Most people fall asleep while reading, isn't it? School curriculum In literature, it’s high time to review, clean up and shorten.
Sports and culture
I wrote about my relationship with sports at school in. I wasn't hopelessly unathletic, and I proved it by earning the title of outdoor instructor. But I did not fit into the school framework: the goat, rope, log and other projectiles became my personal enemies. I think that swimming and self-defense should be taught at school, and there should be rope courses and other devices for active pastime in the yard. There children can climb, hang and develop their normal reflexes.
Here, under sports, I also included NVP - initial military training. Hmm, who would have thought that I would need it? But it was useful!
I know how, for example, to hide behind a tree stump when nuclear explosion. Hmmm, we had such posters hanging in our cabin: actions when the enemy uses weapons of mass destruction. I remember being struck by how important it was to wash off radioactive dust. Why didn’t anyone think about this when, in 1987, strawberries from Zhitomir were sold everywhere, where the wind carried a dusty cloud... And jokes aside, I knew how to disassemble an AKM, march and do exercises on the parade ground no worse than the boys. I served in the army, and my school skills were very useful.
Regarding culture, not everything is so simple. Remember singing lessons? Why singing and not music? No one sang, everyone was fooling around, and our teacher alone bleated his thin barite to his own accompaniment.
But then, already as a teacher, I went to the music lesson to visit my class and make a couple of announcements. I went in and stayed there: they were listening to classics! The children discussed, argued and listened again to certain points. I don’t know if this was in the program, however, I am convinced: you need to learn to listen to music, and different ones at that. It may be optional, but at least give an idea of real music.
Drawing is different from drawing. I myself taught fine arts in a rural school part-time. After short courses, we, young teachers of other specialties, were taught to draw and teach drawing so that everyone could depict a person, a bird or a tree. It turns out there are special tricks that are very effective. They are now actively presented as know-how.
I also include home economics in this category of culture. We were taught to make patterns, sew, embroider and darn holes. Oh, how my knowledge helped me! I regretted that I didn’t know how to sew shoes - I sewed everything else, from dresses to tracksuits, myself. I embroidered emblems, sewed in zippers, everything was like “branded”. Remember “Chinese dresses”? I also sewed them, not only for my daughters, but also for the neighbor girls. I can’t count how many socks and tights I’ve darned.
We were also taught how to cook and set the table. Thanks to Nina Fedorovna for this. But, alas, no one taught us table manners. I acutely regretted this in a Greek restaurant when, due to my clumsy attempt to use a knife and fork, an olive flew straight onto the next table. You can't teach good manners overnight.
What I was clearly missing
After graduating from school, I missed a lot. Nobody taught me first aid. I wouldn’t mind taking driving lessons, a course in minor car repairs, and household appliances or from carpentry skills. Let our girls' home economics and boys' labor lessons alternate! Then they would learn to cook, and we would learn how to repair small things and drive a car. Let us be given a driver's license along with a certificate.
I lacked basic legal knowledge, for example, in the field of consumption or labor protection. I also see today that I had no idea about pedagogy and child physiology. We all deal with younger children: brothers, sisters and nephews. How to handle them correctly? How do you know if adults are treating them and you personally correctly? Issues of hygiene, issues of child abuse and the basics of sex education - this was clearly not given to me.
Yes, many children copy the behavior of their parents. But, if children have an alternative: to grow up the same as their parents or become different, where can they get other role models? At school you have the opportunity to receive not only education, but also upbringing. It would be nice if our children were able to:
- distinguish good from bad not theoretically, but practically,
- plan your life
- do not put off problems, but solve them as they arise;
- be able to calculate your finances;
- be able to protect yourself and know the basics of survival,
- know and apply rules of thumb communication.
And finally. There are many losers in life and that's normal. Nature specifically made people different in terms of laziness and intelligence. But if you don’t teach a child anything, he will have less chance than others, even if the child is naturally smart and active.
And what school items helped you in life, and which ones turned out to be completely unnecessary?
