Etiquette rules that will make you a better person. If you respect yourself and others, remember these basic rules of etiquette forever

Respect each other and respect each other again! This is what we learn throughout our lives. Being well-mannered means not causing inconvenience to other people, not offending anyone with your comments and looking decent in any situation.

Rules of etiquette in society

GROSS VIOLATIONS

1. You're clapping incorrectly.

You need to clap your hands at chest level. Never applaud in front of your own face, much less in front of another person's face.

2. You don't get into the car gracefully.

First, sit on the seat and only then gracefully place your feet in the cabin. This looks more aesthetically pleasing from the outside and will help you avoid a painful and awkward hit to your head on a car doorway. If your shoes are covered in snow, be sure to shake them off before getting into the cabin.

3. You embarrass strangers

You should not look closely at other people, this is bad manners. It's really not worth discussing appearance strangers with a friend, even if the outfit is really flashy.

4. You spread butter or jam from a shared plate.

The sequence of actions is as follows: first put a little butter or jam on your plate. Then spread the sandwich! That's it. Why is this considered more acceptable and correct? Because the crumbs don't end up on the common plate!

5. You don't care about those sitting next to you at the table.

Polite people don’t want to bother someone too much during a meal, and they can also be quite shy. Take the initiative and pass the salt or pepper shaker first! In the same way, pass on other dishes first, politely asking if your neighbor would like to try them.

6. You don't pay attention to your posture.

You probably haven’t thought about it, but looking at a person hunched over a plate at the table is always unpleasant. Keep your back straight in any situation and train yourself to follow this! Posture, it turns out, tells people a lot...

7. You drink during a toast in your honor.

You shouldn’t drink a glass after words spoken in your honor! Instead, make a gesture of gratitude towards the person giving the toast, thereby showing respect and appreciation. Few people know about this!

8. You are careless with napkins.

After eating, you should not wipe your lips with a napkin: you just need to blot your mouth with it. Already used paper napkins can be slightly crumpled, but under no circumstances crumpled! Table etiquette rules decorate the feast, making it relaxed, helping to avoid awkwardness.

9. You return empty plates

If you are treated to food and given a dish in a plate, it is considered impolite to return it empty. Place cookies, a handful of sweets, nuts there - everything as a sign of gratitude for the treat.


10. You start eating before the owner of the table

The rules of good etiquette say that you need to respect the head of the family and home. Wait until the owner starts eating first. That's all wisdom!

11. You cough into your right hand.

If you are unwell or choking, you may feel the urge to clear your throat. You cannot use your right hand to cover your mouth; this should be done exclusively with your left hand.

12. You don't make eye contact while toasting.

When you touch your interlocutor’s glass with your glass, you must meet his gaze, expressing your openness and sincerity! Looking away is bad form.

13. You point your finger at an object that interests you.

Pointing fingers is the last thing. It is much better to make a gesture with an open palm in the direction to which you want to attract the attention of the interlocutor.

14. You're not polite enough

If you are walking along the street with someone and your companion says hello to a person passing by, be sure to say hello. IN in this case to remain silent means to appear impolite and repulsive.

15. You carry a bag on your right shoulder

According to the rules of etiquette, the bag should be worn on the left shoulder, not on the right. The whole point is that the right hand is “social”, which is why you cannot cover yourself with it when you cough. Even if you are a woman and do not shake hands, your right hand is considered contact.

16. You leave your smartphone on a table in a public place

Of course it's disrespectful! This is especially unpleasant for those with whom you are sitting next to at a table in a cafe or at dining table. This shows how significant the gadget is to you and how little you care about what's going on around you.

Some rules of etiquette turn out to be a revelation even for people of advanced age! I will be infinitely glad if this information is useful to you.

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  • Important Topics

    Good manners

    Good manners are the basis for the behavior of a well-mannered person in society. The way of dealing with other people, the expressions used in speech, tone, intonation, gait, gestures and facial expressions are all called manners. Modesty and restraint, the ability to control one’s actions, to communicate carefully and tactfully with other people—it is on these qualities that good manners are based. There are a few basic rules of etiquette that you should adhere to.

    Bad manners are considered to be the habit of speaking loudly, without hesitation in expressions, swagger in gestures and behavior, sloppiness in clothing, rudeness, outright hostility towards others, disregard for other people's interests and needs, shameless imposition of one's will and desires on other people. Also - the inability to restrain one’s irritation, deliberate insult to the dignity of people around him, tactlessness and foul language.

    Manners relate to the culture of human behavior and are regulated by etiquette. Etiquette implies a benevolent and respectful attitude towards all people, regardless of their position or social status. It includes polite treatment of a woman, respectful attitude towards elders, forms of address and greeting, rules of conversation and behavior at the table. In general, etiquette in a civilized society coincides with general requirements politeness, which are based on the principles of humanism.

    A prerequisite for communication is delicacy, which should not be excessive. Do not mistake flattery and unjustified praise of what you see or hear for this quality. There is no need to try hard to hide the fact that you are seeing, listening to, tasting something for the first time, for fear of seeming ignorant. Any pretense is repulsive.

    Ability to behave correctly in different situations can protect you from an unfriendly attitude, which is, of course, important for any person, and especially if we are talking about his business relations. The exchange of formal courtesies (unless it is outright fawning) is actually not such a banal thing as it seems at first glance. By showing proper tact, you win over your interlocutor and leave pleasant impression- that’s the whole axiom.

    The idea of ​​excessive complexity of etiquette rules and the desire to simplify relationships is very controversial. Stopping showing each other signs of respect does not mean taking life easier.

    Courtesy

    When it comes to social events, you should: answer as quickly as possible whether you will come or not; a promise should not be broken except for a very serious reason; and immediately inform the organizer of anything that has anything to do with your participation in the event.

    This approach is universal. Of course, a formal breakfast is more important than a party in a pub, but the essence is the same. Call if you are running late or cannot make it at all, even if it is an informal meeting. It may surprise you, but people sometimes worry about you. For example, did you have an accident if you didn't show up for a meeting? Nowadays, with the widespread use of answering machines, you can cowardly call people when you expect them to be absent and leave your apologies on the answering machine.

    How to introduce people

    There are formal rules about how people should be introduced. There are situations where you certainly must do this with utmost care. More generally, in an ordinary everyday situation or at work, if there is any doubt that someone does not know someone, you should introduce people to each other in the simplest way possible. Of course, you can say more if you want. You can also immediately continue on your way, but you still have to introduce yourself. It is considered very bad form to force your friends to listen to your conversation with someone else without even introducing them to each other.

    All this is even more important when it comes to social events. Many people who are otherwise polite and reasonable do a poor job of this task. They believe that introducing people to each other is not their business. Either they are too shy, or they assume that everyone already knows each other; or find it too formal and tedious to introduce everyone by name. However, presentation is so important to the flow of conversation that it doesn't matter who does it. You may introduce your brother and sister to each other by mistake, but remember: it is better to introduce people you already know to each other than not to introduce them at all. Don't assume that everyone already knows each other. This is another example of underestimating one’s own importance: at some public event. You may know virtually no one, but others may know even fewer there. Then you can become a link between the two groups, and it is your responsibility to introduce them.

    How to give thanks

    What could be more important than this? When I tell people I'm writing a book on etiquette, this is the topic they care about most, and they insist that I cover it. It hurts them how much other people don't bother to say "Thank you." This feeling is so universal - then who are the people who don’t bother to say thank you? Perhaps people expect words of gratitude from others to a greater extent and react sharply to their absence or insufficiency, while they themselves generally forget to say “Thank you.”

    There are a huge number of options in this area, and you have to respect local traditions. However, in general, you should thank people appropriately for almost everything: an invitation (even if you declined it), a gift, a weekend spent visiting someone. You express gratitude immediately, and if the service or gift is very significant, you thank again later - in a letter, or by phone, or in person. (If you are thanking a family or group of people, it is best to do so in in writing, since you may not be able to reach everyone by phone.) In some cases, you may want to give a small symbolic gift. You should never say, “Oh, they probably know how grateful I am to them, so there’s no need to talk about it,” or, “So many people gave me wedding gifts, so I don’t think they expect me to thank each of them in writing.” " Both are completely wrong! I want to emphasize again: you will never make a mistake or offend anyone by expressing gratitude, but you will be wrong if you neglect this simple show of politeness.

    Personal habits

    There is a general consensus that certain manners and habits are inappropriate. This point of view of people should be taken into account, even if you yourself do not share it. The rules include the following:
    Always cover your mouth with your hand when you cough or yawn.
    Use a tissue when you sneeze, or cover your nose with your hand if you don't have time to do otherwise.

    Don't pick your nose or sniffle.
    Don't itch or pick anything out from under your nails - such actions create a repulsive impression.

    The main idea: you should not do anything that is unpleasant to the people who are forced to watch it.

    A little embarrassment

    Sometimes it happens that we unwittingly offend someone. No one is immune from mistakes, from accidental tactlessness in conversation or gesture. As a rule, all you need to do is apologize sincerely and the incident will be over. If you have a sense of humor, then perhaps the best way to apologize would be to admit your mistake in a cheerful manner, laughing at yourself. In any case, the moment of tension that has arisen cannot be left unresolved - it will be unpleasant for both you and your interlocutor.

    When a person sneezes, you should tell him “be healthy!” even regardless of whether you know him or not.

    Cloth

    Many people always dress their own way and don't worry about it. For example, they wear jeans with a shirt everywhere - both to work and to a wedding. Others don't leave the bedroom without makeup and high heels. Such people probably have no problem deciding on clothing. The rest (this applies to a greater extent to women, since men, as a rule, less styles and clothing options and thus less likely to make mistakes) you have to think about this problem. In this case, you need to either follow the rules or think carefully yourself.

    If we are talking about a completely official event, then perhaps the invitation will give some recommendations about this, or you can call the organizers and ask - this will be a completely normal and reasonable step. If the event is less formal, it is best to ask the hostess or another guest. When it comes to visiting some fashionable place, it would be correct to ask the owner (or a friend, if he invited you to stay at his parents’ house): “Are we going to change for dinner?” An elegant dress will help a woman in almost any situation. This is more difficult for men, since in some cases a tuxedo will be required for dinner. Usually you will be warned about this in advance, but there is nothing wrong if you ask about it yourself.

    If you still can’t figure out how to dress properly for an event, ask yourself: “What clothes seem most appropriate for me in this case?” Some people don't like wearing too little, others don't accept formal style, others absolutely don't want to dress like others... Think carefully about everything and choose your outfit; It may not be perfect, but at least you won't feel uncomfortable.

    Old-fashioned good manners and their modern version

    There were many traditional rules regarding how men should behave towards women. Today these rules may seem quite old-fashioned. On the one hand, there is nothing wrong with men continuing to show scrupulous politeness to women. Even the most ardent feminists are unlikely to be angry with someone who is simply trying to be polite to them. There is nothing offensive about, for example, having a door opened for a woman. On the other hand, it should not necessarily be considered a sign of rudeness or bad manners for a woman if a modern young man, generally polite and attentive, does not treat her as if she were a porcelain vase and unable to take care of herself.

    Old rule: Men always open the door for women.

    New rule: The door is opened by the one who is ahead, or stronger, or who is simply more convenient to open it. Therefore, whether you are a man or a woman, hold the door for those who are older than you, or limited in their capabilities, or carrying small child or shopping - it doesn’t matter who is what gender. You can also go first, but then hold the door on the other side for the person behind you. The one who received this service says: “Thank you.”

    Old rule: A man walks around the car (which he is driving) to open the door for a female passenger.

    New Rule: The driver - male or female - opens the door from the outside for the passenger to sit down. At the end of the trip, the driver opens the door and helps an elderly or disabled passenger exit, but in other cases he may assume that the person can handle this task himself.

    Old rule: Men give way to women in public transport.

    New rule: Young, healthy people both sexes give way to elderly or sick people, pregnant women, people with heavy luggage.

    Old rule: Men stand up when a woman enters or leaves a room, and also when she gets up from a table in a restaurant.

    New Rule: In a restaurant, the host or companion may stand to greet the newcomer, show him his seat and perhaps pull out a chair. At semi-formal meetings, when new person or someone is leaving, it is considered normal for all guests to stand up to greet or say goodbye. This avoids dissonance between those who are sitting and those who are standing, which could lead to some awkwardness. Of course, it is quite natural that some will remain seated due to medical problems or due to old age. If someone leaves the room (or table in a restaurant) on short time, then the rest don’t have to get up.

    Old rule: A man accompanying a woman walks outside sidewalk, that is, from the side of the roadway.

    New rule: There is no such thing. Many young people do not even suspect that there was once a rule about this.

    Sometimes situations happen in which we do not know at all how to behave at work and in the office. We want to look like a well-mannered person in the eyes of others, but instead we make ridiculous mistakes. And to do this you just need to know the rules of office etiquette.

    Why office battles of varying degrees of ferocity most often occur - from minor skirmishes to the like forest fire all-consuming scandal? There can be many reasons for this unpleasant phenomenon, but most often we quarrel with colleagues because of an unforgivable disregard for the rules of good manners.

    Wherever you work - in your usual office or in a new place, you must understand: if you don’t want to quarrel with your colleagues, don’t do some simple things. Maintain mutual respect with your colleagues, and the atmosphere at work will be friendly and welcoming.

    Office etiquette - behavior in the office and at work

    We are working more and more. Our place of work has already become our second home, and our colleagues are almost like family. And this is not surprising; this course of things is supported by our superiors. After all, this ties us to the company where we work. But at the same time, you should not forget the rules of office etiquette.

    Don't be fooled by the appearance of comfort. A job is a job, and knowing job etiquette is just as important as your qualifications. Therefore, it’s worth knowing how not to get lost in the often unwritten office rules of good manners

    Work etiquette: what is appropriate and what is inappropriate in the workplace

    Just as at school the appearance of a diary speaks about the student, so now it is yours. workplace can tell a lot about you. And no matter how much everyone around you insists that you are free to feel at home, you should not go to extremes.

    You can put a photo of your family or your favorite cat on your table. But your favorite actor with a naked torso as a background on the office computer monitor is already too much. Also, do not hang decorations on the lamp or place your favorite talisman on the table. What would you think of a person whose workplace looked like this? desk in a teenage girl's room? And one more thing: do not forget about order.

    Office etiquette and appearance

    Your appearance also shows your professionalism. Each company or institution has its own rules. What is customary to wear in a private office is often not appropriate for a teacher to wear at school.

    There are, however, a few basic rules of good manners. Do not wear miniskirts, tight dresses or low-cut items to work, and do not expose your navel.

    All clothing should be clean and ironed, and the wearer should look neat and smell nice. Of course, extremes should be avoided here too. A heavy evening perfume in a small, enclosed space can make your colleagues feel nauseous.

    Office etiquette: birthdays and other holidays

    Not every company has a tradition of throwing noisy parties. If you notice that no one at your work does this, then you shouldn’t stand out with your “three-course menu” for your birthday. If you wish, you can simply treat your employees to chocolate or homemade cookies.

    On big holidays, the most correct solution would be to chip in for a common table. Agree on a small amount that everyone will put into a common piggy bank, and appoint a person who will handle the purchases. If you don't have cash on you at this point, ask a colleague to pay for you. However, do not delay in repaying the debt.

    If, on the contrary, you paid for someone who is in no hurry to return the money, you can subtly hint to him about this, for example, remembering a past celebration. Office etiquette does not allow you to borrow money from your colleagues.

    Office etiquette: greet the boss

    As you know, the most important person in any company is the boss. Even if your company practices democratic communication and everyone calls each other “you,” address your boss with respect.

    If you have always been on friendly terms with him, but during a business trip he offered to drink for brotherhood, do not tell this in the office. Continue to contact your boss formally unless he or she suggests otherwise.

    And don’t be familiar, don’t pretend that you are his best friend. Even if you communicate outside the office, and your children go to kindergarten together, at work he is your boss.

    It is you who should be the first to say “Good afternoon” to him, despite the fact that you are a woman.

    In the art of official etiquette, simple rules reign. Whenever you are in doubt about how to behave, follow your intuition. And ask yourself what behavior you would expect from employees if you were a manager.

    IN modern society office etiquette plays an increasingly important role. Knowing certain rules is a good business card. Sometimes, however, ironic comments are heard on the topic of exaggerated politeness, but it is better to overdo it with politeness than to make a blunder.

    Office etiquette training

    It is important to know who should be the first to extend a hand to shake or be the first to introduce themselves, whether or not to knock on the boss's private office, and how to dress appropriately for a corporate party. Therefore, I recommend turning to various manuals on the topic or going to training. This will increase your professional level, will help you make new contacts easier and improve your position in the team.

    Office Etiquette: Never Do This in the Office

    Don't talk about your personal life. You can tell your close friend about your troubles, but don’t bore all your colleagues around with stories about your mother’s stomach problems or your scandal with your husband yesterday.
    Don't chat on mobile phone. If you are talking about personal matters, go to a secluded place. When you come to work in the morning, immediately reduce the volume of the phone call, because no one is obliged to listen to the latest hit from your mobile phone while you are away from your workplace. This irritates and distracts everyone.
    Don't ask to borrow money. Even if you and your colleague are good friends, it’s still best to avoid this.
    Don't prettify yourself in the workplace. Don't get your nails done while sitting at a desk in a room where other people are also working. And if you want to fix your makeup, go to the toilet.
    Do not spray deodorant, varnish or perfume directly in the office. Not everyone may like their smell.
    Don't eat lunch at work, especially if clients can see it. Take a break, go to the cafeteria or to a designated area for eating.
    An unwritten but obvious rule of office etiquette: we don’t take sandwiches with onions and garlic to work!

    Even if your colleagues are not of royal blood, and the office is not a hall for social receptions, the rules of etiquette in it are more than appropriate. You shouldn’t be arrogant; a look from above has never graced anyone. Even if you have every reason to be proud of yourself and your track record can become a decoration for any resume, you still shouldn’t praise yourself - it’s better to let others do it for you.

    There is also no need to talk about the smart connections that brought you to this place, as well as about authoritative acquaintances among the company’s management. All of the above is by no means best way gaining authority. This way you will not make new friends, but rather find yourself isolated.

    You should also not gossip and spoil your boss and other colleagues - it is possible that your words will sooner or later reach them, and it is unknown in what form. Think for yourself what such talkativeness could mean for you, so at work, try to speak neutrally about everyone, and either good or nothing about your boss.

    By the way, about the boss. Don't try to please him in everything. Career growth It’s better to build based on your own professional qualities and not through flattery. You should not be the first to rush to carry out any assignments, especially those not related to your direct responsibilities. This is unlikely to affect your promotion, but it may cause unnecessary gossip among colleagues. Do you really want to be known as an upstart and a sycophant? Admit it, no.

    Don't be overly curious, even if you are very interested in something. If you like to ask questions, ask about work. Finding out the juicy details about who is sleeping with whom, who is related to whom, will definitely work against you.

    Don’t be a bore - don’t impose a new way of organizing work on your colleagues, even if it is much more effective than what is installed on these walls. First, gain sufficient authority, and only then start giving advice on how to work more productively and what needs to be changed for this.

    Do not make comments to others, for example, do not remind a colleague who has run off to a parent-teacher meeting at her child’s school that your work day ends at six sharp. You should not rush to help those who do not ask you for it; be patient, correct, friendly, witty and at the same time careful in your statements. This is the best way to make friends and not make enemies.

    If you work with foreign partners or your position involves visiting other countries on business trips, then you should be aware of the rules business etiquette adopted in their homeland. Otherwise, you risk getting into an awkward and delicate situation.

    So, in Austria, you need to keep both hands on the table during a meal. And under no circumstances call Austrians Germans. In Belgium, don't keep your hands in your pockets and don't confuse the Belgians with the French. Don't call the Netherlands Holland: the Netherlands also includes Suriname and the Antilles.

    As you have already seen, adhering to the rules of etiquette at work (and in everyday life) is very simple and even useful. When communicating, remember a simple commandment: how you treat people is how they will treat you.

    Definition of the term

    Etiquette in modern society is a list of generally accepted rules that relate to a person’s behavior towards other people in certain life situations. Etiquette was once taught as a subject in schools. The children were taught this by meticulous tutors. Today this word has lost popularity, however, it does not bother anyone to learn at least the basic rules of behavior at the table, in the theater, in society.

    There are several main types of such rules.

    The ability to present yourself - rules for creating a wardrobe, appearance, self-care, physical fitness and posture, gait, postures, gestures.

    Speech etiquette – the ability to correctly say greetings, compliments, thanks, and give remarks; rules of farewell, politeness, manner of speech.

    Table etiquette - table manners, serving standards, eating habits.

    Rules of etiquette in society - how to behave in a museum, at an exhibition, in a theater, restaurant, court, library, store, office, etc.

    Business etiquette - relationships with colleagues, superiors, good manners in business, ability to conduct business negotiations, etc. -

    Etiquette in clothing

    The first impression is the strongest and most memorable, and in addition, intelligence is shown in the choice of clothes for the occasion. To make a good impression, it is not enough to be fashionably or expensively dressed. If you want to please others, you must consider them and take into account different circumstances. Therefore, even in the formation of a wardrobe, it is customary to follow the rules of etiquette in society. It is important that the clothes are beautiful and suit you, but it is much more important that all the details of the appearance are organically combined with each other, and that it corresponds to the time, place and situation. It is not customary to wear evening clothes during the day, and to wear leisure clothes to work. Every time, when choosing what to wear, you must take into account the situation, the appropriate occasion, time, place, and do not forget about your own age, features of your figure. Everything you wear should always be clean, hemmed, buttoned and ironed. The exit outfit should always be in full readiness. When building your wardrobe, remember that it should include mandatory items, such as suits, formal trousers and skirts, blouses and evening wear, as well as home sets.

    Good manners in society The ability to present yourself begins with gait, posture, gestures, postures, manner of sitting and sitting. The rules of etiquette in society require a beautiful gait with a straight posture, when the arms move slightly in the rhythm of the step, the shoulders are straightened, and the stomach is tucked. You can’t lift your head high, but you shouldn’t walk with your head down either. Postures and gestures are no less important. To make a good impression, you need to behave simply and naturally. It is considered bad manners to twirl something in your hands, twirl your hair on your finger, drum your fingers on the table, stomp your feet to the beat of music, touch any part of the body with your hands, or pull another person’s clothes. As for the question of how to sit correctly, it is important to know only two rules: do not cross your legs and do not fall apart, spreading your legs and arms to the sides.

    Speech etiquette

    Polite words are special formulas that encrypt a large amount of information, both semantic and emotional. It is necessary to know them by heart, be able to choose the ones most suitable for the occasion and pronounce them in time in the appropriate tone. Masterly, correct mastery of these words is speech etiquette in modern society.

    1. Greeting

    When introducing yourself to a company, state your name clearly and clearly if no one has introduced you. It is not necessary to shake hands if there are a lot of people, however, if you have done one handshake, you will have to go around everyone present. Only a woman can give a gloved hand, and only if the glove is thin and not, for example, a knitted mitten. It happens that a person’s hand is busy or, for example, dirty if he is caught at work, and he holds it out to be shaken on the wrist. This is actually unacceptable. When greeting, the one who is younger says the greeting first. If we are talking about a man and a woman, then the man greets first. If you are greeted with the words “good afternoon,” then it is rude to respond with the word “good,” you should respond with the full phrase “good afternoon.” Now let's imagine the following picture: a group of men is standing, a familiar (or unfamiliar) lady approaches them or (passes by). Who should greet first, men or women? The first word of greeting is said by the one who approaches, regardless of whether it is one person or a group, a man or a woman. The one or those who are on site respond to the greeting.

    When choosing a form of greeting, put enough meaning and feeling into the words. For example, you would not act very delicately by saying “good afternoon” to a person whose face shows that he is upset about something. Or it is completely unacceptable to say “hello” to your boss, except in cases of personal friendship. Be attentive to words and people - when greeting them, call them by name or patronymic. Men should greet each other with a handshake. When meeting a lady, the gallant gentleman kisses her hand, and he should not pull her towards him, but must bend down as far as the woman offered her hand.

    2. Appeal, presentation Which appeal is preferable must be decided in each specific case, depending on the audience you are addressing. It is customary to address acquaintances by their first name or first name and patronymic; the second is considered a sign of greater respect. In a formal setting, when introducing someone, use their first and last name. And calling by patronymic, for example Ivanovna, is acceptable only in the village, but not in secular society.

    3. Requests The word “please” is truly magical; it must be heard in all requests. Since the request in one way or another burdens the person to whom you are addressing, in some cases it is worth adding: “If it’s not difficult for you,” “Wouldn’t it be difficult for you?” It is also appropriate to say: “Do me a favor, be kind, could you,” etc.

    4. Farewell Before saying goodbye, you should prepare your interlocutor for parting: “It’s too late,” “Unfortunately, I have to go.” It is then customary to express satisfaction with the time spent together, for example, “I'm glad we met.” The next stage of farewell is words of gratitude. Sometimes you can pay a compliment to the hostess of the house, say goodbye and immediately leave without lingering. In addition, the rules of etiquette in society require the ability to invite, apologize, console, express condolences, and gratitude. Each of these forms of address should sound natural, sincere, excluding rude and harsh phrases and phrases.

    Table etiquette

    Eating beautifully is just as important as moving and speaking well, but this is where moderation is especially important. There is no need to try to specially embellish the process of eating, for example, eat in very small pieces, hold out your bent fingers. It is enough not to open your mouth while chewing, not to talk with your mouth full, and chew your food thoroughly before putting another portion in your mouth. Never drink before swallowing food, unless you unexpectedly put hot food into your mouth. If you see your food is hot, don't blow on it before you start eating. Try to eat and drink absolutely silently. In society, bread is eaten not by biting off a whole piece, but by breaking off pieces from it. Salt from an open salt shaker, if it does not have a special spoon, should be taken with the end of a clean knife, then poured onto the edge of your plate. Ketchup or mustard as a condiment is offered only in the most relaxed atmosphere. While eating, try to stain your plate as little as possible; do not stir or smear food on it. Never, even at home, eat with your hands. It is customary to hold the fork in the left hand and the knife in the right. If you are eating a salad, you can take a fork right hand. If you want to drink or take a break from eating, you need to leave the fork and knife in a criss-cross or “house” position. Always take the spoon with your right hand; if you eat from a soup bowl, leave the spoon there after eating without putting it on the table. After finishing a meal and before drinking, it is customary to use a napkin.

    Having invited a lady to a restaurant (or other similar place), the gentleman takes care of her outerwear, helps her take off her coat, puts it in the wardrobe, keeps the number for himself, and does not give it to the lady. (By the way, the same applies to a ticket in a theater, cinema, or in transport. Having bought a ticket for a lady, for example, on a bus, a gentleman keeps it until the end of the trip and gives it to the lady only if he does not see her off to the end, but gets off earlier.)

    If the table is not booked in advance, then all negotiations with the head waiter are conducted by a man. Having escorted the girl to the table, the man moves a chair for her, after which he takes his place. If the glasses are not filled by a waiter, then a man does it, having first asked permission. When pouring wine, turn the bottle so that drops do not fall on the tablecloth.

    If there are several people at the table, then the eldest woman is poured first. If they drink champagne, then the man pouring it starts with himself, pouring a few drops into his glass, then the eldest lady, then you can simply go in a circle, finishing with your glass.

    If you are in a very fancy restaurant where they serve a lot of utensils, for example, there are several forks and knives near the plate, then you start with those that are further from the plate. If the purpose of some devices is not clear to you, then there is nothing wrong with asking the waiter.

    If there are unfamiliar people at the table, then it is better to conduct conversations on general topics and not discuss mutual friends. It is not necessary to finish everything that is on the plate, just as it is not necessary to leave pieces. To show the waiter that the plate can be taken away, place the cutlery on the plate “at five o’clock,” that is, approximately where the small hand on the dial is at five o’clock.

    Etiquette: rules of behavior in society and public places

    The essence of the rules of conduct in public places can be expressed in one phrase: treat others the way you want them to treat you. In other words, we don’t need to do anything that we ourselves don’t like.

    The behavior of each person should be such that no one feels discomfort from him.

    There are some specific rules of good manners in public places, which are extremely important to observe.

    1. In a museum, at an exhibition, at a vernissage. The rules of conduct in these “temples” of art are the same all over the world and are extremely simple: walk through the halls quietly, speak in a subdued tone, do not touch anything with your hands, do not come too close to paintings and exhibits, so as not to disturb other visitors.

    2. In the theatre, philharmonic, concert hall Modern rules of good manners are somewhat contradictory. Previously, a man had to invite ladies to such public places; today it is considered quite decent if a girl herself invites him to a play or concert. And even if she is the one who pays for the tickets for two. Fine well-mannered man must play the role of a gallant gentleman, courting the lady everywhere. It is important to arrive on time, calmly undress, take a seat without disturbing anyone. People with impeccable upbringing should not chew anything while watching.

    In a theater hall, if the seats are in the middle of the row, you need to sit down in advance, without waiting for the last signal, so as not to disturb other spectators. If you have to disturb those sitting, you must apologize. The disturbed person does not make a dissatisfied face and does not wait until he is asked for permission to pass, but he himself gets up in advance, noticing those walking along the narrow passage. The polite people who stood up need to be thanked.

    If for any reason you are late, you must enter the hall quietly and sit silently in the nearest empty seat.

    3. In court, church, clinic, library The rules of etiquette and good manners in society call for one to behave in these places as quietly and inconspicuously as possible. You cannot talk, rustle, chew or walk unless absolutely necessary. Appeals and questions should be answered politely and in a low voice. In any establishment, it is important to maintain good manners, be accommodating, tactful and polite. The main thing is that your stay should not cause discomfort to any of those present.

    4. In the store

    1. Before entering the store, you need to let those leaving it pass.

    2. If there are elderly people, pregnant women, or disabled people nearby, they will enter first.

    3. Taking animals with you is strictly prohibited.

    4. Do not enter the store with a lit cigarette or ice cream.

    When visiting a store, men do not take off their hats, but if they stay there longer, talking with the manager or the seller, then it is necessary to take off their hat.

    For service in the store you are entitled to thank. If you don’t like the product offered, it is advisable to return it with a proper explanation, but without unnecessary comments.

    If there is a line in the store, everyone must respect it, if the person is educated and knows how to behave in a store. If a disabled person, an old person with feeling unwell, a pregnant woman, a woman with a child, any well-mannered store visitor should let such customers go ahead of him. People will notice your good manners and culture, and will understand that you know how to behave in a store.

    5. On the street

    On the street, the courtesy and politeness of everyone is manifested in the desire not to push each other, to give way. Boys, teenagers, men help girls, women or elderly people carry heavy bags, and if they don't know how to behave on the street, then explain in a calm and polite tone.

    Observing traffic rules prescribed for pedestrians is not only polite, but necessary. It is customary to walk on the sidewalk on the right side. If you are walking with a group of friends, make sure that you do not block the left half of the sidewalk intended for oncoming passers-by. On a narrow sidewalk, a man gives way to a woman or an elderly person.

    It is indecent to blow your nose loudly on the street, sneeze, pick your nose, or yawn in someone’s presence. If someone sneezed, it is better to pretend that you did not notice it. Do not throw garbage on the sidewalk; there are special trash cans for this purpose.

    Laughing loudly, shouting, singing, thereby disturbing passersby on the street, is not accepted.

    It is absolutely natural that you need to be attentive to small children, mothers with children, the elderly, and the sick.

    If you push or step on someone’s foot, you must immediately apologize, showing your good manners, the person will notice that you know how to behave on the street. If in front of you is the same well-mannered person, then he will not get angry, but will say in response: “please,” “don’t worry.”

    When we are forced to pass through a crowd of people standing on the sidewalk or, say, on an escalator, then it is necessary to use the following words: “allow me,” “please,” “with your permission.”

    If you get lost on the street, contact a policeman, postman, or taxi driver.

    6. In transport

    1. when entering the metro, tram, trolleybus, bus, others must be given the opportunity to exit;

    2. do not linger at the door, but go into the salon;

    3. Be sure to give up your seat to older people, young mothers with children, and pregnant women;

    4. children school age they do not give up their place, they must give up their place to their elders;

    5. if you are traveling with a companion older than you and you gave up your seat, then not only she, but also you should thank her for this;

    6. You cannot take dirty items with you into transport.

    If we are sick with something infectious, for example, the flu, then we are not supposed to travel on public transport, so as not to expose other passengers to the risk of infection. If circumstances force us to travel while unwell, then when coughing or sneezing, we are obliged to cover our nose and mouth with a handkerchief.

    When traveling in a car, you must sit in such a way that the driver does not block the front view. If one person gets into the car, then she sits in the back seat on the right. When traveling long distances, you can sit in the front seat to keep an eye on the road.

    When we travel on a train, remember that we are not alone here and must be considerate of other passengers.

    When we entered the compartment, we needed to say hello to everyone and take seats according to the purchased tickets. It's good to give up your seat to an older person. It happens that a person cannot ride backwards; and you don’t care how you sit, give him your seat. Useful site recommends helping mothers traveling with small children, pregnant women, these are simple rules of etiquette and how to behave in transport everyone should know.

    Train passengers must agree among themselves in what order they will change clothes, getting ready for bed and getting up in the morning. Before arriving at your travel destination, pack your things in advance; if you find things or documents forgotten by someone, give them to the conductor.

    Business etiquette

    Good manners at work - prerequisite for each employee. What points does business etiquette cover? Easy rules will help you understand this issue. Maintaining subordination with colleagues and superiors. Arrive at work on time and quickly complete your duties. Polite communication with both colleagues and visitors. Confidentiality at work. Dress appropriately for the institution where you work. Lack of personal topics in discussions. Maintaining order in your workplace. Ability to communicate over the phone. The rules of business etiquette in society help to achieve the goals set in business. Thanks to good manners, you can move up the career ladder and be a successful, self-actualized person in everything. To be a pleasant person in any situation, so that people want to do business with you, you need to perfectly know the laws of behavior in society. They will help not only achieve any goals, but also become a confident and happy person.-

    “Nothing comes cheap or is valued as much as politeness.”
    Cervantes

    HOW TO BEHAVIOR IN SOCIETY?

    It is a well-known fact that a person is not capable long time to be alone. Therefore, in order to once and for all forget about what lies under the word “loneliness”, people simply must learn proper communication with each other.

    Not every person is lucky enough to receive a good upbringing in childhood and learn the rules of behavior that are instilled in the family and continue to be supplemented and improved in the future. kindergarten, at school, and throughout life. The rules of behavior accepted in society will help you communicate with people at ease and be a pleasant conversationalist.

    Men and women have different vital functions and, therefore, different rules behavior in society. It is generally accepted that a man should be a breadwinner and protector, that is, resourceful and courageous. Women are physically weaker, they are guardians hearth and home, need protection. Based on this, the rules of conduct for men and women are appropriate.

    However, there are rules that are equally fair for both men and women, so we will look at them today. So what should a polite person be like?

    ETIQUETTE - WHAT IS IT?

    In order to learn to be a polite person, it will take a lot of effort, perseverance and a lot of work on yourself, and the first thing you need to do is give an objective assessment of your behavior at the moment. An outside perspective is very helpful in such a situation. This will help you understand and analyze all the errors present. bad habits, wrong actions committed and one’s behavior in general. After which you can safely start “working on mistakes.”

    Etiquette is universal human moral standards, a set of rules of behavior in society: addresses, greetings, manners, clothing. Manners are forms of human behavior. The essence of etiquette is respect for other people.

    Once upon a time, the rules of good manners in communication or the rules of etiquette were one of the subjects educational program at school. Children were taught this science and strictly controlled how well they learned it; tutors were responsible for raising children. Currently there are no tutors or corresponding subjects in school curriculum, and the need for teaching basic politeness is still high.

    Let's try to figure out what the rules of good manners are and let's strictly follow them.

    RULE ONE - COURTESY

    One of the basic rules of good manners in everyday life, everyday life is courtesy in relationships, the ability to greet people without unnecessary demonstrations, the ability to congratulate you on a holiday, express sympathy or wish you good health, as well as the ability to thank you for the service provided to you.

    In addition, the concept of courtesy presupposes that the person entering lets the person leaving, who, in turn, holds the door if necessary; the man walking next to the girl always lets her go ahead, with the exception of going down the stairs, exiting the elevator and public transport.

    Despite the fact that some prim manners have long since become obsolete, for example, closing the car door behind a girl before getting behind the wheel, it still doesn’t hurt to help ladies get out of the car.

    RULE TWO - FORM OF APPLICATION

    Correctly addressing another person, whether familiar or not, is an important part of the rules of conduct. Thus, the rules of behavior accepted in society state that you can only address children under 18 years of age, close friends and relatives. All other strangers, even if they are younger than you or your peers, should only be addressed as “you.”

    In addition, it is customary to switch to “you” when strangers appear and call a relative or friend by the first name and patronymic, including when it is inappropriate to demonstrate familiar or family relations. The transition from “you” to “you” should be appropriate and tactful; as a rule, it is initiated by a woman, a person senior in age or position.

    If absent people are mentioned in a conversation, you cannot talk about them in the third person - “they” or “she”, even if they are close relatives - you must call them by name or by name and patronymic.

    There are three types of address that are used in different situations:

    • official - citizen, sir, madam, and the titles and titles of the represented people are also used;
    • informal - by name, using “you”, brother, dear friend, girlfriend;
    • impersonal - used in cases where you need to address to a stranger. In these cases, the phrases “sorry”, “excuse me”, “I beg your pardon”, “tell me”, and so on are used.

    It is unacceptable to address a person by gender, occupation or age: woman, man, plumber, salesman, child, etc.

    RULE THREE - KEEP YOUR DISTANCE

    The rules of human behavior in society require maintaining the correct distance between interlocutors. There are the following generally accepted distances in communication:

    • public distance - when communicating with in large groups people is more than 3.5 meters;
    • social distance - when communicating between strangers, between people with different social statuses, at receptions, banquets, etc. from 3.6 to 1.2 meters;
    • personal or personal distance – for everyday communication between familiar people, ranges from 1.2 to 0.5 meters;
    • intimate or sensory distance – for communication between very close people, entry into this zone is allowed only to a select few, it is less than 0.5 meters.

    At the same time, it is important that each of the interlocutors always has the opportunity to freely exit the conversation; holding a person’s hand or the lapel of a jacket, or blocking the passage during a conversation is considered unacceptable.

    In addition, it is important to choose suitable topics for conversation; they should be interesting and pleasant to both interlocutors and should not affect personal matters. It is considered unacceptable to interrupt the interlocutor, correct his speech or make comments. It is also indecent to watch and stare at your interlocutor for a long time, especially if he is eating.

    I bring to your attention a video about the rules of human behavior in society:

    BE COMMUNICATE!

    IN modern world not knowing the rules of etiquette means spitting against the wind, putting yourself in an uncomfortable position. Unfortunately, many perceive adherence to certain norms and rules of communication as something shameful, considering it a sign of highbrow aesthetes who are completely far from real life. However, these people forget that rude and insensitive behavior can cause the same reaction in return.

    In fact, the basics of etiquette are quite simple. This is a culture of speech, basic politeness, a neat appearance and the ability to manage one’s emotions. Both apply to both men and women.

    1. If you say the phrase: “I invite you” - this means you pay. Another formulation: “Let’s go to a restaurant,” - in this case, everyone pays for themselves, and only if the man himself offers to pay for the woman, can she agree.
    2. Never don't come visit without calling. If you are visited without warning, you can afford to wear a robe and curlers. One British lady said that when uninvited guests she always puts on shoes, a hat and takes an umbrella. If a person is pleasant to her, she will exclaim: “Oh, how lucky, I just came!” If it’s unpleasant: “Oh, what a pity, I have to leave.”
    3. You shouldn't ask a girl out on a date through and, even more so, to communicate with her like that.
    4. Do not place your smartphone on a table in public places. By doing this, you show how important a role your communication device plays in your life and how much you are not interested in the annoying chatter going on around you. At any moment you are ready to leave useless conversations and once again check your Instagram feed, answer an important call or get distracted to find out what fifteen new levels have been released in Angry Birds.
    5. Man never doesn't carry a woman's bag. And he takes a woman’s coat only to carry it to the locker room.
    6. Shoes should always be clean.
    7. If you are walking with someone and your companion greets you with a person, should say hello and to you.
    8. Many people believe that you can only eat with chopsticks. However, this is not entirely correct. Unlike women, men can eat sushi with their hands.
    9. Don't make idle chatter on the phone. If you need an intimate conversation, it is better to meet with a friend face to face.
    10. If you are insulted, you should not respond with similar rudeness, and, moreover, raise your voice at the person who insulted you. Don't get down to his level. Smile and politely move away from the ill-mannered interlocutor.
    11. Down the street the man should walk to the left of the lady. Only military personnel can walk on the right and must be ready to perform a military salute.
    12. Drivers must remember that in cold blood splashing passers-by with mud is a blatant lack of culture.
    13. A woman may not take off her hat and gloves indoors, but not a hat and mittens.
    14. Nine things you should keep secret: age, wealth, a gap in the house, prayer, composition of a medicine, love affair, gift, honor and dishonor.
    15. When you come to the cinema, theater, or concert, you should go to your seats only facing those sitting. The man goes first.
    16. A man is always the first to enter a restaurant., main reason- on this basis, the head waiter has the right to draw conclusions about who is the initiator of coming to the establishment and who will pay. If a large company arrives, the person who invited you to the restaurant enters first and pays. But if a doorman meets visitors at the entrance, the man must let the woman through first. Then he finds empty seats.
    17. Never you should not touch a woman without her desire, take her hand, touch her during a conversation, push her or take her by the arm above the elbow, except when you are helping her get on or off a vehicle, or cross the street.
    18. If someone calls you impolitely (for example: "Hey you!"), you should not respond to this call. However, there is no need to lecture or educate others during a short meeting. It is better to teach a lesson in etiquette by example.
    19. Golden rule when using perfume - moderation. If in the evening you smell your perfume, know that everyone else has already suffocated.
    20. A well-mannered man will never allow himself to fail to show his due. respect for a woman.
    21. In the presence of a woman, a man smokes only with her permission.
    22. Whoever you are - a director, an academician, an elderly woman or a schoolboy - when entering the room, say hello first.
    23. Maintain confidentiality of correspondence. Parents should not read letters intended for their children. Spouses should do the same towards each other. Anyone who rummages through the pockets of loved ones in search of notes or letters is acting extremely rudely.
    24. Don't try to keep up with fashion. It's better to look not fashionable, but good, than bad.
    25. If after an apology you are forgiven, you should not return to the offensive issue and ask for forgiveness again, just don't repeat such mistakes.
    26. Laughing too loudly, chatting noisily, staring staring at people is offensive.
    27. Don't forget to thank your loved ones people, relatives and friends. Their kind deeds and willingness to offer their help are not an obligation, but an expression of feelings worthy of gratitude.

    I am very sensitive to the rules of good manners. How to pass a plate. Don't shout from one room to another. Do not open closed door without knocking. Let the lady go first. The purpose of all these countless simple rules- make life better. We cannot live in a state of chronic war with our parents - this is stupid. I take great care of my manners. This is not some kind of abstraction. This is a language of mutual respect that everyone understands.

    American actor Jack Nicholson
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