The main components of successful communication. Rules for communicating with people

Today, in the age of developed information technology, popularization social networks and virtual communication, we often have to deal with the inability of people to communicate with each other in real life. Not everyone is able to carry on any conversation or become an interesting and worthy interlocutor; for some, this is very difficult. But not everything is so hopeless. It turns out that this can be learned. So, how to learn to communicate with people?

Communication can be called successful if a common language with the interlocutor is found. Absolutely anyone can have difficulties in communication, and education and wealth do not play a role here inner world, sense of humor, erudition, etc.

It's more of a psychological barrier.

What does it take to make communication interesting and entertaining? How can you create an irresistible desire in your interlocutor to continue? In general, how to become a person with whom it will be interesting to communicate?

How to arouse interest on the part of your interlocutor

Each person is individual. We are all endowed with some qualities that are unique to us. Everyone has their own goals, outlook on life, principles and priorities. It is absolutely normal for everyone to want to feel some kind of significance in society. It is this desire that is the main key to success and good luck in communication.

In order for communication to be called successful, it is enough to show concern for what your interlocutor says. The ability to carry on a conversation, be interested in the thoughts and opinions of your interlocutor, the ability to listen carefully, be sincere and friendly in a conversation, perhaps this is what will help you learn to communicate with people. It is not for nothing that they say that the ability to listen and hear an interlocutor is valued much higher than the ability to speak. Not everyone has the ability to listen, and even fewer people have the ability to hear.

This does not mean that when meeting you need to attack your interlocutor as if he were an old friend. Not everyone will like this, and it may even scare you away.

Be very careful in your judgments; they should not be categorically indisputable. Last word leave it better for the interlocutor than for yourself. If you wish to produce pleasant experience at your interlocutor, give in to him in the argument: the relationship will not deteriorate, and you will remain unconvinced.

Do not show arrogance in any conversation. When speaking, weigh every word. you must understand that an arrogant tone, a desire to elevate yourself above your opponent can greatly offend him, and then his opinion of you will not be the best, and he is unlikely to have a desire to communicate with you again.

Try never to remain on the sidelines, be closer to people. Each person will be much more pleasant to communicate with someone who is on the same wavelength with him, so hiding in a corner will not be the best solution.

What to pay attention to

If possible, avoid conversations that contain complaints about your superiors, work colleagues, work in general, or your fate. Remember that everyone has enough problems without you, so no one wants to listen to other people’s problems. People communicate for fun.

An important psychological point in a conversation is the posture in which you and your interlocutor are. It has been proven that by adopting the pose of your interlocutor, you thereby open him up to communication and create comfortable conditions for him.

When speaking, try to always remain yourself. Unnaturalness in communication, the desire to show yourself as a completely different person from the outside can look very funny and ridiculous, although it may seem to you that you fit into this image perfectly. In any case, you won’t be able to play for a long time, and sooner or later people will find out what you really are like. So why splurge and deceive your interlocutor already at the initial stages of communication. Naturalness and ease are the basic rules of behavior in communication.

Often, certain complexes of a person serve as an obstacle to normal communication. It is always worth remembering that no one is perfect. Everyone also has their own pros and cons, advantages and disadvantages, however, this does not prevent them from communicating well and being the life of the party. If you yourself feel good and confident when communicating, those around you will definitely notice and appreciate it.

It is very important to look your interlocutor in the eyes when communicating. A person who averts his eyes to the side during a conversation is unlikely to inspire confidence in his opponent. By doing this, you will either show how uninterested you are in what the other person is saying, or what a dishonest person you are. It seems like nothing special, but still this is a very important moment in communication, which can attract conversation or, on the contrary, repel.

If you don’t know a person well, once you know his name, try to repeat it during a conversation and call him by name. This will be a very polite sign on your part.

Probably everyone has found themselves in a situation where there is a not very pleasant pause between a conversation. To avoid such an awkward moment in communication, you should forget about short answers like “yes” and “no”. Answer your opponent’s question as fully as possible and also ask questions that require a more detailed answer. This way your conversation will flow on its own. But don’t overdo it here either. Communication should not turn into an attack with questions. The interlocutor should feel comfortable, and not as if he is under interrogation and simply forced to answer.


Of course, the more knowledge you have, the more you will be able to interest a person. Diverse interests cannot fail to attract your interlocutor. It is always interesting to communicate with someone who can tell some stories, tell about some interesting facts, etc.

Learn to correctly express your thoughts and ideas, adapt them to the perception of others. Remember that not everyone has exactly the same image in their head as you do while telling a story. To do this, try to convey to your interlocutor the image that arose in your mind, provide information more clearly, and explain everything that is necessary.

Don't rush to answer questions right away. A pause will help you not only collect your thoughts and think about the answer, but will also show interest and mystery on the part of the person with whom you are talking.

Excessive gestures in communication can prompt the interlocutor to think about your lack of self-confidence. Extraneous hand movements can greatly distract from the essence of the conversation, while no one will appreciate the importance of your words; they simply will not pay attention to them.

Avoid using words and phrases with ambiguous connotations. Your words may be interpreted incorrectly and may even offend your interlocutor. Be clear about what you mean.

Not everyone can adapt to their interlocutor. This is enough important point in communication. Observe your opponent, the pace of his speech, and try to repeat it as much as possible. Communicating in the same manner will turn your conversation into a constructive conversation.

By the way, even in a business conversation, sometimes it will be appropriate to demonstrate your sense of humor. If you apply it in a timely manner, you can defuse a tense situation and make communication easier.

When communicating, consider the age of your interlocutor. Let's say the conversation is with a person who is much older than you. Here, accordingly, you should avoid slang expressions that may not be at all familiar to your interlocutor.

Let's sum it up

Of course, the main teacher is experience, which does not come immediately. To obtain it you need time and appropriate conditions. The main thing is to be as self-confident as possible, to be able to “carry” yourself, to position yourself in society. Expand your circle of friends to include completely different people: in age, in their views, and in their life positions.

Any communication starts small. Thanks to some communication skills, you will be able to become an authoritative person in your circles, to whom everyone will listen with interest. It is not for nothing that it is said that self-love gives rise to the love of others for you. Only when you begin to respect yourself will others begin to do the same towards you.


The ability to communicate will definitely lead you to success. Communication skills are essential in everyday life. Never be afraid to step out of the shadows and be the first to communicate. Be polite and friendly, and then you will be able to win sympathy from your interlocutor. Good luck and success.

Each of us is a member of society in general and a certain social group in particular, and it is almost impossible to imagine a person who could live in society without communicating with other representatives of this society. Every day, every person enters into a number of communication processes, communicating with relatives, family members, friends, colleagues and other people. However, some people can communicate with strangers without any difficulties in a matter of minutes, and during friendly meetings and even in the company of unfamiliar people they are always the center of attention, while others experience difficulty communicating even with those closest to them.

Psychology of communication with people, its essence and basic principles

The psychology of communication with people is called upon to study the rules and secrets of successful interaction with others - a branch of psychology aimed at studying the characteristics of different types communication and identifying patterns and rules, adhering to which, each person will be able to enjoy success with their interlocutors and avoid difficulties in the dialogue process. The psychology of communication distinguishes three types of communication: friendly, intimate and business, but all these types of communication have one thing in common - in the process of communication, a person shares with the interlocutor not only information, but also feelings and emotional state.

One of the main rules of the psychology of communicating with people is that when communicating, not only speech is important - facial expressions, intonation, and the emotional coloring of what is said also carry an informational message. In interpersonal communication, people do not perceive dry facts, but a continuous flow of information transmitted both verbally and non-verbally. Therefore, we can conclude that the psychology of communicating with people is based precisely on sharing with the interlocutor not only some information, but also emotions.

Techniques to achieve success in communicating with people

In order to learn to better understand the interlocutor in the communication process, to be able to adapt to his emotional state and communication style, psychologists recommend honing your communication skills. For this purpose, you can use the following techniques:

1. Observation- observing your interlocutor, noting the peculiarities of his behavior, speech, clothing style, gestures, etc., you can draw certain conclusions about this person (about his field of activity, belonging to one or another social group etc.). Based on the conclusions made about the interlocutor, it is quite easy to choose a manner and style of communication in order to find a “common language” with him.

2. Sharpening your communication skills- communicating with different people With both acquaintances and strangers, you can not only develop communication skills, but also overcome communication barriers. By entering into dialogue with strangers (asking the time, clarifying the route, talking with a random fellow traveler, etc.), a person can learn to intuitively adapt to the interlocutor.

4. The ability to “read” the emotions of your interlocutor and control your own emotions- since a significant part of information during communication is transmitted non-verbally, the ability to distinguish between the different emotions of interlocutors will be the key to understanding and effective interaction with other people. Typically, people with developed ability People with empathy are more successful in communicating with others, because in the process of dialogue they focus not only on the words of the interlocutor, but also on his emotions and state of mind.

Sincere recognition of the importance of the interlocutor and his achievements.

By studying the psychology of communicating with people, honing one’s own communication skills and the ability to empathize, everyone can learn to overcome barriers in communication and find an approach to the interlocutor. Undoubtedly, knowledge and ability to use in practice the rules and techniques of communication psychology will benefit each of us, because communicative people have much better chances in all areas of life.

10 rules of communication for those who want to be successful

When talking about the components of success, they usually name the following: optimism, self-confidence, perseverance, hard work, and the ability to learn from mistakes. But they often forget that we live among people, work with them and for them, so the ability to build relationships with others is important. important factor our comfortable state of health and achievements at work.

According to studies conducted in different countries, relationships in a team influence job satisfaction no less than working conditions. True, men and women have different ideas about what a good microclimate is. For men, it is enough for the relationship to be calm and non-conflict. Women need friendly affection, similarity of interests, and spiritual understanding.

But for both of them, success is impossible without interaction with people: employees, colleagues, partners, clients. It has long been noted that the king is played by his retinue. In the same way, we can safely say that the people who surround us can play along, help us, or, conversely, hinder our career advancement.

If you have an unprofessional team, have ill-wishers or partners who do not respect you, then no matter how great a specialist you are, there will be a lot of obstacles on the path to success.

What are the rules for effective communication that ensures success?

  • Be a positive person. Approach people with positive expectations. Do not create negative images in your thoughts (stupid, incompetent, lazy, deceiver, thief) of those with whom you have to work. Negative energy is transferred to the communication partner and, accordingly, sets him in a certain mood.
  • Don't treat people with contempt, take a sincere interest in them. Address people by name. Be aware of the life events of those with whom you often communicate (birthdays, family, hobbies).
  • Don't think of yourself as the center of the universe. Have self-respect, but don't be proud. Its signs: a feeling of infallibility and irreplaceability, boasting, unhealthy competition, refusal to help, the desire to always prove that one is right, excessive touchiness.
  • Don't be too pushy, similar to representatives network marketing or sellers from whom you immediately want to leave. Do not indulge in long monologues about your favorite dog or car, or about your problems, forgetting about the interests of your interlocutor.
  • Learn to control your emotions, do not lose your composure, try to avoid quarrels. Impulsiveness, harshness, anger, and resentment do not contribute to mutual understanding.
  • Influence not only a person’s mind, but also his feelings. Try to satisfy people's needs for recognition and respect. At least sometimes ask for advice. Everyone likes to be competent and helpful.
  • Consider the opinions of others. Know how to listen and understand a person's point of view. Don't interrupt the speaker, even if you don't agree with him.
  • Criticize less, praise more(of course, for real merit). Appreciate other people's virtues, achievements and admit your mistakes. This always disarms even those who are unfriendly.
  • Don't skimp on compliments, but don't confuse them with flattery. A sincere compliment is always pleasant, lifts your spirits and helps to establish contact.
  • Be grateful. The more often you say “thank you,” the more positivity, warmth and participation you receive in return. Express your gratitude to people for their attention, kind words, support, help.

“Good relationships with people are the main ingredient in the recipe for success”(T. Roosevelt). Use these rules in life - and you are guaranteed the desired prospects in your career and business.

1) a necessary condition the success of the communication process is the compliance of the behavior of interacting people with each other’s expectations;

2) employee satisfaction with interaction with the organization is the same necessary condition for the continuation of this interaction as satisfaction with the organization.

23. Rules for winning favor to yourself people:

    be genuinely interested in the other person

    smile,

    remember that a person’s name is the sweetest and most important sound for him,

    be a good listener, encourage others to talk about themselves,

    say only what interests your interlocutor (this is the surest way to a person’s heart),

    instill in your interlocutor an awareness of his significance and do it sincerely.

24. Techniques for creating attractiveness one person for another.

Attraction(from Latin - attract, attract) - this is the appearance of attractiveness of one person for another during communication.

The attraction is formed using special techniques:

- “Proper name”;

- “Mirror of relationships”;

- “Patient listening”;

- “Personal life”;

- “Golden words.”

Proper name– this is the best music for any person. We must strive to remember the new name and address the person by name.

Reception "Mirror of Relationships"“implies the presence of a friendly facial expression, a smile, which makes people want to communicate. In Japan, people who cannot smile are not hired. It is believed that constant seriousness is a mask hiding mediocrity and incompetence. A smile costs nothing, but gives a lot.

Application of the technique " Patient Listening” indicates that you are ready to understand the person’s problems. A good manager always encourages and supports conversations about the personal interests of the interlocutor, has a list of interests and hobbies of his employees, and knows their family problems.

A very effective technique to win over a person is "Golden words" - compliments.

Compliments must be prepared in advance. They should not be ambiguous, exaggerated, moralizing or critical. A compliment that can win over even ill-wishers: this is the so-called compliment against the backdrop of an anti-compliment to oneself.

Some scientists believe that receiving signs of attention is the goal of our life, and life is a struggle to receive them.

Below is the mechanism of attraction formation. It shows what a person experiences when communicating with whom special methods of forming attraction are used, and what needs of this person can be satisfied in this way.

Psychological mechanism of attraction formation

Special techniques for creating attraction

Proper name

Mirror of relationships

Patient Listening

Personal life

Golden words

Calling a person by name

Kind smile, pleasant facial expression

Attentive and patient listening

Gentle questioning about personal life

Compliments

Signal

I see your personality

I'm your friend

I am ready to understand your problems

I'm interested in everything that happens to you

I noticed your good qualities

Needs are being met

in self-expression

In self-expression

in recognition

in self-improvement

You need to memorize these techniques like multiplication tables and learn to use them naturally and naturally.

25. Declension rules people's judgments to your point of view (according to Cornegie):

It is necessary to show respect for the opinion of the interlocutor;

You should never tell him that he is wrong;

If you are wrong, admit it quickly;

Keep a friendly tone from the start;

Let your interlocutor do most of the talking;

Try to see things from the other person's point of view;

Appeal to nobler motives;

Present your ideas effectively;

Challenge;

Touch the nerve.

Library
materials

LESSON PLAN

“Rules for successful interaction, or basic principles of effective communication”

(fragment of training for high school students “I am the author of events in my life!”)

Learning Objectives:

    To promote students' understanding of communication techniques (active listening techniques) as the basis for successful communication;

    Expanding ideas about methods of self-analysis and self-correction in the field of communication.

Developmental goals:

    Contribute to the development of communication skills through organizing dialogue and mastering methods and techniques of effective communication (and developing the ability to use active listening techniques

Educational goals:

    Promote the formation and development of tolerance through the development of empathy based on the technique of active listening.

Materials and requirements for organizing the game: Colored chalk, cards with tasks for 4 groups, “Active listening” memos, markers, magnets, pens, cards with words, multimedia projector, PC.

Lesson steps:

    Acquaintance.

    Designation of the topic of the lesson.

    Workshop. Determining the rules of effective communication through the organization of group work in shifting pairs and groups.

    Workshop. Modeling situations taking into account acquired knowledge and experience (work in groups). Presentation of group work.

Progress of the lesson

Organizational moment.

Leading. Hello!

Communication has always been valued not so much for the exchange of information (even very necessary), but for the opportunity to come into contact with unique worlds - human personalities. To do this you need very little... to be able to open yourself to another person. This means that you need to “learn” the techniques of successful communication.

There is a well-known statement by Christopher Morley, in which he wittily noted that

There is only one way to become a good conversationalist - this is ... "?

Based on my life experience how would you complete this sentence? What do you think the author meant?

Answers. You can write down the answer options on the board

Leading. In the original this statement goes like this:“There is only one way to become a good communicator - to be a good listener” . You were right in your answers.

Indeed, this statement contains one of the secrets of effective communication - “being able to listen.” Today in our lesson we will try to summarize our ideas about effective communication and formulate rules that help achieve this.

How do you understand the meaning of the phrase “effective communication”?

Answers.

Leading. Really,the effectiveness of communication is determined not only the ability to speak, but also the ability to listen, hear and understand what the interlocutor is saying.

At the first meeting, it is customary?... to get acquainted. Let's get to know you too.

Acquaintance. (hand over an object) I will ask you to say your name, as well as any quality that you like about yourself.

Leading. Thank you. It was a pleasure to meet you.

Any experience gained through experiencing a situation seems more valuable than if you were simply told about it.

Exercise "Listener".

Target : create conditions for awareness and understanding of the need to “listen”, “see” the interlocutor in the process of communication.

Instructions. I will ask you in pairs, as you sit, to turn your back to each other. Decide who the first interlocutor is, who is the second. First interlocutor - now you are within 30 seconds. tell your partner about your life, what you imagine in 3 years - when you finish school, choose your field of activity. The second interlocutor listens. On my command, you will switch roles.

Turn to face each other. Now you will need, within 30 seconds. exchange the information that you heard from your interlocutor. The second interlocutor begins. On my command, you will switch roles.

Compare the volume and content of what you said with the volume and content of what was heard about you.

Answers. There will be those who have misrepresented information.

What do you think prevented your interlocutor from hearing you and reproducing the information in full?

Answers. Haven't seen your partner

    That is, when communicating, it is important to see the interlocutor, look him in the eyes! This is the first rule you formulated. Great!

What else got in the way?

There was no goal to remember and reproduce, “I just listened” .

So you didn't make a conscious effort to hear the sound, understand it and remember it?

Answers. Yes.

Leading. In Webster's Dictionary, “listen” means “to make a conscious effort to hear a sound” or “to pay attention to it.” Essentially, “hearing” means physically perceiving sounds of a certain meaning.

Speak the diagram on the slide.

LISTEN

HEAR

make a conscious effort

physically perceive

hear the sound" or "turn

sounds of a certain meaning

attention to him,” i.e. Thisvolitional act.

Listening requires desire.

From this alone it is clear that listening is more than hearing.

    This is another rule of effective communication.

Listen to your interlocutor or in other words, show interest in what he is talking about.A certain philosopher once said: “Two can speak the truth - one speaks, the other listens.” And in order to be able to listen, it is necessary to be imbued with the feelings of the interlocutor, that is, to showEmpathy - this is another rule.

Before you formulate the next rule of effective communication, I offer you one more small exercise.

Exercise “Distance”.

Target : a game aimed at developing effective communication and interaction skills.

Instructions. If people are more or less long time communicate and interact with each other, then certain relationships develop between them. These relationships can have varying degrees of intimacy. In other words, every person knows with whom he communicates closely, with whom his relationship can be called close. The relationship with someone is not yet very close, well, maybe simply because there has not yet been a reason or opportunity to communicate.

You already know each other quite well. At the same time, each of you is probably aware of the peculiarities of his relationships with other members of our group. Now is your perfect chance to check whether your understanding of your relationship with the group members is correct. Who is ready to take the first risk and become a volunteer?

Note . Identification of “risky” participants before the upcoming procedure is entirely justified. Firstly, such identification in itself can be considered as a sociometric technique, and secondly, it makes it possible to detect those who are able to safely endure the “rigor” of the procedure. When those interested show up, the presenter explains what the exercise consists of.

Leading. The degree of closeness of our relationship with a particular person can be determined using the concept of “psychological distance.” Let's try to express the closeness - the distance of relationships with each other through distance in the literal sense of the word - through distance in space.

All participants move chaotically around the office, approaching different participants at a distance that will be comfortable for both. At the same time, take into account relative position. The task must be completed silently. The participants move and define themselves. The presenter should not rush the children so that they have the opportunity to think.

Please remember your distances and disperse...

Discussion . Was it difficult to predict the location of your comrades? Did you feel confident when determining the distance? Have you been disappointed? Or, on the contrary, did it make you happy? Did you try to guess how the group members might have become, or did you simply translate your vision of your relationship into the language of spatial characteristics? What surprised you about this exercise? What new things have you learned about yourself and your comrades? How did you understand that this distance was comfortable for you and your partner?

What conclusion can be drawn based on the experience gained?
Can you name the next rule?

    Take into account the language of postures and gestures, distance in communication

Are gestures and facial expressions always enough?

Answers. (No).

    Feedback is important – verbally, that is, words!

To make sure we are understood.

There are certain reference phrases for implementation feedback in dialogue.

I understood you correctly...”
“I heard you correctly that...”
“Let me clarify...”

“I would like to clarify...”, etc.

Leading. Look (the rules formulated on the slide) what rules have you already formulated, what else in your opinion may be important in communication?

Write down the missing rules on the board.

Leading. We spend most of our time in a team, and carry out activities to solve both individual and collective problems. Now we will simulate collective interaction.

Exercise "Shapes"
Target: This game is for spatial imagination and attentiveness. During the game, you can track many moments important for team building training. For example, the roles of the participants, group dynamics, etc.

Time10-15 minutes

Resources:rope 1 m long * number of participants.

The group is divided randomly into 2 parts. One of them is blindfolded, they are the performers, the other is the observer.

Instructions: To perform the next exercise, you need the whole group to stand in a circle. Take the rope in your hands and stand so that a perfect circle is formed. Now close your eyes and, without opening them, build a square. Only oral negotiations can be used. When you think the task is completed, let me know.

Is the task completed? Open your eyes.

Discussion. Do you think you succeeded in completing the task?
Let's listen to the answers. But we don’t comment on them.
Leading. Now I will suggest you to build another figure under the same conditions. You can build it for more short time? Fine. I suggest repeating the experiment. We close our eyes. Your task is to construct an equilateral triangle.

You can invite the groups to change places, and, taking into account their experience, build their own figure.

Results of the exercise

    Are you satisfied with the group's results?

    What factors influenced the success of the task?

    Which of these factors could you influence?

    What conclusions will you draw from the exercise?

Discussion. What was important? (hear and listen, take initiative, make group decisions, ...) Observers share what they see.

What other rule should we formulate?

    Don't interrupt

    Do not evaluate your interlocutor

Do the rules that we have formulated take place in life?

Answers. Yes.

Work in groups.

Are the conclusions we have reached today completely new to you?

Answers. No. Generally accepted rules.

Leading. I am glad that you have built your knowledge into a certain system, enriched your experience, etc.In communication psychology, these rules are calledrules of active listening.

The most interesting thing about knowledge is that it is useful in life. Three-quarters of human communication consists of speech. Yet verbal messages are easily forgotten, and failure to listen can be costly. Active listening and interpersonal communication can be learned through training.

And I invite you to apply this knowledge in specific situations.

You will work in groups of 3 - 4 people, each group receives a task ( ) - based on the situation, compose a dialogue taking into account the acquired knowledge. You are given 3 minutes to work in groups, 1 minute to present a dialogue.

Presentation of the results of work in groups.

Summing up . What difficulties have you encountered?
In your opinion, which group was able to optimally apply the rules of effective communication - active listening?

In what other life situations can the rules be applied?effective communication ? Offer your options.

Answers.

Summing up. Reflection.

"Sinquain" - receiving feedback.

Instructions . I propose to summarize the results as follows. Using syncwine. Perhaps some of you are familiar with this form, someone will gain new experience...

Rules for compiling syncwine.

Line 1 – one word, usually a noun, reflecting main idea;

Line 2 – two words, adjectives describing the main idea;

Line 3 – three words, verbs describing actions within the topic;

Line 4 - a phrase of several words expressing an attitude towards the topic;

Line 5 – one word (association, synonym for the topic, usually a noun, descriptive language is allowed, emotional attitude to the topic).

Discussion

Leading. Thanks for the lesson. You were pleasant interlocutors for me, good listeners. I hope the experience gained in this lesson will help you feel more confident and comfortable communicating with different people in different situations. As a souvenir of our meeting, I would like to leave youReminders on the rules of effective communication . ( 2 ).

Goodbye! Good luck!

Appendix 1

    Situation 1

The “applicant” comes to the company for an interview based on a recruitment advertisement in connection with the expansion of production. The HR manager is interested in a qualified employee.

Build a dialogue between “Manager” and “Applicant” (who is looking for a job), using the rules of effective communication (rules of active listening).

    Situation 2

There is a lesson on a new topic. The “student” was late for class (10 minutes).

Build a teacher-student dialogue using the rules of effective communication (rules of active listening).

Complete your answers on a special form.

    Situation 3

A “teenager” turns to his “father” with a request to let him go to a friend’s house to play on the computer. The father is initially not inclined to give permission.

Construct a dialogue between “Son” and “Father” using the rules of effective communication (rules of active listening).

Complete your answers on a special form.

    Situation 4

Two teenagers. One of them does not return his computer disk to the other, although he promised to return it, but did not keep his promise.

Construct a “teenager”-“teenager” dialogue using the rules of effective communication (rules of active listening).

Answers can be provided in writing.

Appendix 2

“When you don’t understand, it becomes boring, when they don’t understand you, it’s insulting.”

E. Sevrus

Our listening style reflects our personality, character, interests and aspirations, position, gender and age. Much, of course, depends on the situation, for example, communication at work is different than at home, when we take our time and relax, etc. Essentially, listening requires flexibility in choosing a style, taking into account the characteristics of the interlocutor and the situation, in where communication takes place. For the most part, we don’t know how to listen and don’t like to listen. Meanwhile, what deposits of valuable information can be obtained from a person who will perceive you as an attentive and grateful listener! What is needed for this? Listen. There is no need to condescend to someone or humiliate yourself in front of someone. If you learn to communicate as equals, but with dignity, with the most different groups people, communication on the phone, a selection interview, or the first day at a new job will not be a difficult test for you in the future. So, active listening involves:

RULES FOR ACTIVE LISTENING.

    1. interested attitude towards the interlocutor Concentrate your attention completely on your interlocutor. Pay attention not only to words, but also to posture, facial expressions, and gestures.

      if necessary, clarifying questions Check whether you understood the interlocutor’s words correctly (use supporting phrases: “Did I understand correctly that ...”, “I can clarify ...”, “That is, you wanted to say that ...”) getting an answer to your question (this may be “yes”, “no”, “not really”). Don’t give advice.

      Don't give ratings .

      If questions are asked, you must patiently listen to the answers to the end anddon't interrupt

      Pose (You must sit opposite the person; the body is tilted slightly forward.)

      Sight (Friendly, look into the eyes). When we listen, we look the other person in the eye and slightly nod our head in agreement. What do we agree with? We agree that a person has the right to express his position, and we have the right to listen to it.

Nods. Never forget to nod your head slightly when a person answers your questions! You will notice that this easy action “unwinds” your colleague, he pronounces his position in more detail and detail, and at this moment you are able to understand him more accurately.Stimulating the interlocutor to tell a story (Uh-huh, Yep, etc.).

e- mail: kolcsvetlana@ yandex. ru ,

Kolchanova Svetlana Sergeevna, educational psychologist, MAOU Gymnasium No. 1, Tyumen Page 10

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